The blue sky and the expanse of green grass decorated with colorful flowers illustrate how beautiful this world is. The cool wind that blew hit the face of a girl who was now sitting on a park bench. The milk-colored eyelids were closed, enjoying the fragrance of the flowers neatly arranged there.
I ran towards the girl. a girl who has never lost her smile for as long as I know. "Sun!" I called the girl, the girl seemed to open her eyes and turned to the source of the voice. "Sorry I'm late, did you wait long?" The girl just smiled, the smile that always made me feel like everything would be okay.
"No, I just came," he replied. I smiled sincerely, but unfortunately the girl in front of me never saw it. She's an innocent girl who always looks happy, even though I know her life can't be said to be fine, but she's luckier than me. I'm just a bad girl who is less fortunate with all the material advantages I have. Parental fighting makes me hate everyone who is happy, I hate my life, and I hate this world. Until I met him, he who I always used as an outlet for my annoyance, turned out to be the person who understood me the most. He is the one who always listens to all my ravings, he is also the one who gives me advice and motivation, until I come back to believe in the existence of happiness in this world.
"Hey, look at that butterfly, it's so beautiful" I shouted, pointing at the yellow butterfly, I who was originally smiling relaxed my smile and glanced at my best friend. “Sorry” I mumbled, “Butterflies must be very pretty, I saw them a few times when I was little” he said happily without the slightest bit of sadness. I really salute him, he can't see, but he can always feel all the beauty around him. His eyes always radiated serenity, and it made me feel envious of him, he was too lucky.
We sat in silence for a long time enjoying the quiet atmosphere in the garden, talking occasionally. Until it was evening. "Looks like it's too late, I have to go back to the orphanage" I turned to my friend who was holding the stick he used to show the way, I helped him and gave it to Mentari. "Yeah, I'd better take you home" I said helping him up. We walked hand in hand along the outskirts of town to the orphanage where Mentari lived. Yes.. she is an orphan girl, but I never caught her from her, because I always saw her looking happy even though she had many flaws. Not that I always complain with everything I have.
"Are you sure you don't want to stop by?" asked Mentari who I shook my head, although he did not know, but he could feel it, because he is my best friend. "Okay, thank you Cahaya" he said sincerely, I could only smile and hug him before saying goodbye to go home.
I am Cahaya Mauralinsya, a girl who lives well enough who was born from a fairly well-known family. My father is a state official and my mother is a famous designer, they are really successful. They always gave me anything I wanted, toys, clothes, vacations and everything anyone could want. But honestly the only thing I want from them is time.
Because of their busyness, I feel alone, in the morning I eat breakfast alone and at night I sleep alone. I know I'm a teenager, but I want them to grow old. They used to be as successful as they are now, those who always take care of me, and those who are always with me.
For the past few months I have felt as if the world hated me. My parents are always fighting, and it really frustrates me. I am looking for an outlet for my annoyance, I bully my friends including Mentari who is now my best friend. Ahh.. forgive me if I have to remember my stupidity first. It wasn't my stupidity to spill a drink on his head, or spill sauce on his shirt, nor did I push him into a puddle. Yes.. I admit it's evil. But what I regret the most is when it happened. an incident that made the sun no longer able to see the beauty of the world decorated with blue skies and green grass.
He was the one I always oppressed, willing to sacrifice for my safety. He pushed me to the end of the road until I fell and instead became his victim, a very hard impact on his head made him lose his sight and some fond memories of his childhood. I really regret what I did, when I saw the blood flowing and covering part of his face, I felt confused. And I really couldn't forgive myself when I heard the doctor's statement that Mentari was blind and had mild amnesia. Until now I still can't forgive myself, I always feel nauseous when I see that smile. I should be happy, but what if he himself can't see my mocking smile which has now become a sincere smile like a friend.
If only I could play with time, I'd like to improve it. About Mentari and all my togetherness with my parents.
It was a very sunny morning and I thought it was perfect to go. Throw away all negative thoughts and forget all the events that have become daily routines after these few months. I can still clearly hear the sound of crockery and cursing from my parents, I can only cover my ears with a pillow and try to fall asleep even though it's hard.
I have to consult with my motivator, Mentari. Only he can make me believe that everything will return to the way it was.
test..
Ahh.. why did he have to drip at the wrong time? I immediately took a handkerchief to wipe the blood that came out of my nose. I couldn't help but close my eyes as the pain in my head got worse, my head felt like it had been hit by an explosion and made me sway. I would almost fall if no hands were now holding me, "Oh my God, what's wrong with you?" asked my sister panicked, I could only shake my head and replied casually "I must be tired, Sis." Surya didn't seem to believe it. He looked at me intensely as if warning me not to try to lie.
Honestly, I don't know what's wrong with my body. I knew something must be wrong, but I was too scared to know. I don't care about my body, why would I care if things don't change. My father and mother will not return to the way they used to be, neither will Mentari.
"Light, big brother doesn't want anything bad to happen to you, we have to check your health" he suggested, I could only shake my head weakly to refuse. Looks like my plan to meet with Mentari has to be pushed back, I really can't feel my hands and feet right now. "I just need to rest, Sis," he whispered. I heard Surya take a deep breath, but finally he complied and helped me lie down on the bed.
"Get some rest, don't think about anything" he whispered before leaving and after that I really fell asleep.
.
It's been a week since that incident, and during that time, every day I've been feeling the pain getting worse. My head is always dizzy and I often faint, the food I eat never runs out and I even take it out again. I really don't know what's wrong with my body, do I have a disease? or something? But I really don't want to know about any of that, I don't want to care before my parents care, I just want them now.
Today, after waiting for a week, you finally get to meet my best friend. I ran to meet him where we used to meet, a very beautiful garden and full of my memories with him.
"Is everything okay Light?" asked the Sun with his warm gaze. "Everything went as usual, nothing has changed in a long time" I replied after sitting next to him. "Believe me, everything will return to normal, I'm sure.. all you have to do is keep believing and persevere, this is just a form of creator's love for you. I will always be by your side, you don't have to worry if you feel alone" I looked at him sadly . Why did my words feel like I had a new power? Why does he always say confidently, even though every day the belief in the completeness of my family is slowly eroding Sometimes I feel that Mentari is an angel sent by God to inspire my life, he is always cheerful and never gives up, making me start to believe in the wisdom behind all this.
"Aww..shhh!" I screamed as I felt my head throb violently, my eyes shut tight lamenting the pain that was now running through my body. "Light? What's wrong?" Dimly I heard Mentari's question, but for some reason my head felt like it was hit by concrete that was ready to crush me. "Lamp!?" now the voice sounded panicked and worried, over time my vision began to blur and suddenly everything went dark.
.
I fell silent after receiving the information from the doctor in front of me. "Then doc, what can we do?" asked Sis Surya half shouted, he was as surprised as I was. "As I said earlier, Cahaya's brain cancer has entered stage 3 and the chances of recovery are small, even though there are several procedures that we can do, one of which is chemo therapy," he explained. "But this will take a very long time, considering your sister's condition is getting worse day by day" he continued, I really couldn't say anything. My eyes are empty, is this real? I was diagnosed with stage 3 brain cancer and my condition is getting worse, is this also a form of God's love for me? Or does he hate me?